Things I'd Never Take Back
by spacegirl23
Summary: Six years after Season 5. Lucas is having marriage problems with Peyton and he goes to Brooke. Browen.
1. Things I'd Never Take Back

**Disclaimer:** I don't own One Tree Hill. I just play with the characters in my downtime.

**Author's Note:** This is my first published fan fiction. Please be kind with your reviews.

_For Browen fans_

* * *

"I'm leaving Peyton," went Lucas Scott's calm and steady tone.

Brooke Davis was about to take another sip of her cappuccino, but that statement caused her to pause, her hand holding the mug suspended mid-air. What the hell was he thinking? Had he gone out of his mind? Did he just say the Lucas-Peyton epic romance that spanned more than twelve years was over?

Lucas placed his hands over his eyes, leaned back his head and sighed. "Can you please say something?"

"What do you want me to say?" Brooke asked, bewildered. Did he want to hear her say 'no, you guys can work it out?', or 'how about the kids', or even a 'congratulations'? She looked out the large window of the coffee shop they were in, at the busy people rushing off to wherever. She replayed in her mind how Lucas had called the day before to say that he was in New York, if she could meet up with him for coffee. She'd been surprised to know that he'd flown out by himself, it was usually him and Peyton and their two young kids. She should've known there was a problem.

A silence settled upon them. Lucas sat up, and then went to stirring his black coffee. Brooke crossed her legs, and put her hands on her lap. She studied him. Lucas had not changed much after college. He'd put on a little weight, but he was still as handsome as he was the day she sat naked in his car's backseat. Same blond hair. Same lips. Same blue eyes.

Lucas looked up at her. He leaned over the table and took her hand in his. "Brooke, do you ever wonder what if?"

* * *

Brooke opened the front door, deep in thought. She took off her coat, glancing around the beautiful yet cozy three-bedroom apartment she called home.

"Hey, you're home." Owen Anderson, her husband of three years, walked out of their living room and gave her a full kiss on the lips. She grabbed him in an embrace. He wrapped both arms around her slender waist, his head dipping to take in the smell of her hair. He was so huge and huggable. Sensing something was wrong, he held her tight against his chest, then whispered in her ear, "How'd it go?"

'It' referred to her coffee with Lucas this afternoon. How had it gone? After he'd asked her if she ever wondered, she considered the only two reactions she could give – 1) answer 'no' coolly, sip her cappuccino and make fake small talk all afternoon, or 2) get the hell away from him.

She chose the latter.

She'd hurriedly gathered her bag and her coat, mumbled a quick excuse about a meeting she forgot she had, and fled as fast as she could.

* * *

That night, Brooke lay restlessly on their king-sized bed. She had been tossing and turning for the past half hour, thinking back to her conversation with Lucas earlier. Secretly, she was glad Owen had work (he was still bartending).

She hadn't told him what happened. She'd just told him that he was having problems with Peyton, and he came to talk to her. Owen had nodded, and said that he understood. He never pushed. Owen had always given her space, and he'd promised that he'd never make her do or say anything just for his sake.

"_Honey, would you mind if I didn't change my last name to Anderson?" she'd asked quietly, resting her head against his bare chest. They were in their honeymoon in the Caribbean, and were sitting leisurely at the beach, waiting for the sun to set._

"_No. Do I see you demanding me to change my last name to Davis?" he'd answered, causing her to giggle. She sat between his legs, with his arms wrapped around her. _

"_So, it's really okay if I'm still Brooke Davis?" she'd asked. _

_He simply kissed the side of her head and said "I wouldn't love you if you weren't."_

Giving up on falling asleep for the next few hours, Brooke stood up and silently walked to the bedroom across the hall. The room was smaller than theirs, and was filled with dolls, and books, and frilly little-girl things like tiaras and stuffed unicorns. The walls were painted a soft yellow hue. Sleeping soundly in the four-poster bed was their two-year-old daughter Madison in her light blue silk pajamas.

Brooke watched Maddie, looking peaceful and content between her countless stuffed animals and pillows. She sat down, careful not to wake her, and reveled on how much she was a mixture of Owen and herself. Madison was a beautiful child, with ebony brown locks and full lips from her father, and dimples and hazel eyes like her mother.

She tried to stifle a yawn but couldn't, causing Maddie to stir. The tiny girl opened her eyes sleepily. She smiled when she saw Brooke, "Momma."

"Hey sweetie," Brooke whispered, crawling into bed with her precious daughter. Maddie raised her arms to indicate she wanted a hug, and Brooke obliged, the tiny girl folded up against her.

"Daddy?" Maddie asked, her delicate fingers playing with Brooke's chestnut-colored hair.

"He's at work, baby," Brooke explained. Maddie was definitely a Daddy's girl. Owen could not even dream of refusing their baby anything. He said it was because of those hazel eyes.

Maddie pouted. Brooke couldn't blame her; just Owen's presence was comforting.

"How about we sleep now and tomorrow morning Daddy will be here?" Brooke asked, smoothing Maddie's hair.

Their baby's face lit up, "Kay!" Brooke chuckled. Who would've known that her hot bartender could manage to win the youngest of hearts?

"Love you. Love daddy," Maddie said with a yawn. Brooke felt sleepy herself. She pulled up the covers over them, and snuggled with her little girl until they both fell asleep.

* * *

Brooke stepped out of the conference room, ahead of all the managers of Clothes Over Bros. She had been a little distracted during the meeting, which everyone attributed to last week being Fashion Week, and having a lot of orders come in.

She had been walking to her room, eager for a latte, when her assistant Millicent had rushed to her, handing a list of all the people who've called during the meeting. She was just about to say 'thanks' and send Millie on her merry way when her assistant added, "Also, Lucas Scott is in your office to see you."

In her office? In the middle of the day?

Brooke mustered her best professional-looking face when she'd entered her room, shutting the door behind her. Lucas spun around, looking dashing in his black suit and blue tie.

"You've been ignoring my calls," Lucas said, an accusatory tone to his voice.

"It's because I don't want to talk to you," Brooke answered. Lucas's eyebrows shot up.

"If this is about yesterday, Brooke, I'm sor-", Lucas started, his eyes never leaving her face.

"No, you don't get to apologize and feel like a good guy, Lucas. Not anymore!" Brooke interrupted him, her eyes flashing.

"What do you mean?" Lucas's voice grew louder.

"Do you wonder?" Brooke's voice now matched his in volume.

"It was a harmless question!"

"No, Lucas, harmless is when you meet an old friend for coffee! Harmless is when your old friend does not allude to him thinking of what-could've-been between you two! This is not fair to Peyton, and it is most especially not fair to Owen!"

"So you want me to think you don't also wonder? Remember two boys and a girl, me coaching Little League, you buying treats for the team?"

"That was ages ago! We were drunk, and Peyton just rejected your proposal!"

"Brooke, what if you could've been happier? With me?" Lucas tried again.

Brooke paused, thinking of how just the sight of Owen sleeping on the couch with Maddie sprawled on his chest made her office problems seem like someone else's life. Of how waking up to her husband's light snoring, or Maddie's demands for a hug, was the best way to start a day. Of how just knowing she had them, that she could go home to them at the end of the day, made all her horrible experiences with her parents or with men seem worth it now.

No, Brooke Davis could not even be possibly happier than she was. And here, listening to Lucas Scott go on and on about a future they didn't have, made her realize that.

"I can't even imagine that, Luke," Brooke answered truthfully. "You have to go."

* * *

Brooke sat alone in a table, watching Owen through her dark sunglasses. She'd been receiving strange looks from people in the bar but she didn't care. The platinum blonde wig she wore was getting a little itchy, and the blue scarf around her neck didn't go with her outfit, but she couldn't care less about appearances tonight.

She looked on as girl after girl hit on her husband. She'd wanted to give each and every one of them a black eye, but she had to admit they had good taste. In his tight grey shirt and dark jeans, Owen was easily the best-looking guy in the bar.

She slowly inched her way through the bar, grateful that it was an incredibly busy night and Owen would not even notice her. She faced the dance floor, careful not to turn toward the counter.

"I swear Holly, the hot bartender's wearing a ring!" An overly excited high-pitched voice caught Brooke's attention.

"Uh-uh, I do not believe you!" An equally annoying voice answered, sounding all valley-girl.

"Seriously, a wedding band!"

_Brooke played with the band on her finger, thoughtfully appraising the paint colors for Maddie's room._

"_You don't have to wear that if you don't want, you know," Owen had appeared behind her, taking her into his arms._

_That had surprised her. She actually loved her ring, but she was quite interested in what he had to say. She playfully replied, "So how will the other hot bartenders know I'm taken?"_

"_They won't. But I will," Owen smiled, twirling her to face him. "You don't deserve an insecure guy Brooke. And you sure as hell will not get one."_

"So, you're married huh?" 'Holly' (Brooke assumed) wanted to know.

"Happily," Owen said. Brooke felt her eyes water. He was just so wonderful.

"Tell me about your wife," 'Holly' pressed. Brooke could just imagine Owen sighing. He hated airheads.

"She's nothing short of amazing. No one in this bar, or in this planet for that matter, holds a candle to her."

With that, Brooke had burst into tears and run off, out the bar, into the night.

* * *

Brooke woke up to the sound of water pouring out of a faucet. She could see from the light in the bathroom that Owen was home. She stood up and walked toward the bathroom, finding Owen bent over their large marble sink, with his back to her.

_Brooke woke up to the sound of footsteps entering the hotel room. She slowly opened one hazel eye. She found Owen carrying a tray of what looked like breakfast: bacon, eggs, ham and orange juice._

"_Hey," she greeted him, now that she was fully awake. It was the morning after they first made love. She snuggled deeper beneath the covers._

"_Hey back." He leaned over to give her a kiss. Her hand automatically went to his belt loops, pulling him toward her still-naked body. It was quite disappointing that he was now dressed because she had been so pleased with what was under his clothes._

"_I was actually thinking of a different kind of breakfast," Brooke murmured, her lips attacking his neck. "But bacon and orange juice are kinda okay too."_

_Owen chuckled, his body fully pressed against Brooke's. "Hey, I got you something."_

"_A present?" she squealed. _

_Owen stood up, pulling up a small box from the bedside drawer. He walked over to her and placed it under Brooke's nose._

"_I was going to give you that last night, but we got a little distracted…"_

_Brooke raised an eyebrow at Owen, a smirk playing on her lips. Owen crossed his arms over his chest. She opened it, finding a gorgeous dainty dress watch. It was breathtaking._

"_You like it?" Owen sounded smug._

"_I love it!" Brooke couldn't contain how precious it already was. She pulled it out of the box._

"_It says something on the back," Owen told her, sitting beside her on the bed._

_Brooke looked behind the watch's face. In fine print was carved: 'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine'._

She sat quietly on the edge of their bathtub. "Hey," she greeted him softly.

He replied with a grunt.

"How was work?" she asked, hating how quiet their bathroom seemed without their easy chatter.

"I called you today. At work," Owen started. He stood up but was still not turning to face her. "They said you were talking to Lucas Scott."

Oh. "He came by today," Brooke said, trying to keep her tone light. "He wanted to talk-"

"Are you leaving me for him?" Owen asked, bitterness evident in his voice. He turned around to face her, his dark brown eyes boring into her hazel ones.

"No, honey," Brooke started, her heart breaking at how miserable Owen looked. "I'm not leaving you. Not for anyone."

Brooke giggled as Owen pulled her with him inside Tric. "Owen, it's 7 AM on a Tuesday morning. I don't think you're allowed here." Owen gave her a 'devil may care' smirk. "They're not going to mind."

_Dressed in tiny denim shorts, flip flops and Owen's plain gray shirt, she scooted over to a barstool. Owen, on the other hand, went behind the bar and began to tinker with some bottles._

"_So, what'll Brooke Davis be having?" _

"_Said the recovering alcoholic?" Brooke teased._

_Owen rolled his eyes. _

"_Wow, this place is huge," Brooke mentioned, turning around to look inside Tric. "I've forgotten how big it looks without the crowds." She leaned back on the counter, scanning the empty stage and the tables._

_The sound of a shot glass being placed behind her made her turn around. She casually faced the counter, eager to take a drink. Instead of some liquid though, the shot glass held a ring._

_A diamond ring._

_Brooke's eyes shot up to look at Owen. For the first time in two years, Owen didn't look as cocky or self-assured. He looked a little nervous._

"_I love you Brooke Davis," Owen said, taking her hand in his. "Would you marry me?"_

"I was going to tell you that I wouldn't give you up without a fight," Owen mumbled. He slumped back against the sink looking defeated. "I called to tell you that what we have is worth a hell of a fight. That you and Maddie are my life, and that I'd have no problem in beating up that scrawny blond writer ex of yours. But after finding out you were with him, I thought that maybe you were going to tell me that-"

Brooke choked up. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry for making you think for even a moment that I could ever leave you, or even hurt you."

Owen's gaze dropped to the floor.

"Lucas told me he was leaving Peyton. And he asked me if I ever wondered if he and I could've been happier."

Owen took a deep breath. His dark eyes fixed on Brooke, he asked, "What did you say?"

"That I can't even imagine being any happier than I am now. It's been over with Lucas for more than a decade." She could not imagine loving anyone as much as she loved Owen Anderson. Brooke walked up to her husband and wrapped her arms around him. She had never felt as safe or as loved as when Owen held her close.

She took his chin and forced him to look into her hazel eyes, "You are the love of my life."

"Ditto, Brooke Davis," he whispered, before pulling her for a kiss. "So, bartender trumps writer?"

"You know it," she murmured before closing the gap between them.


	2. Things I'd Never Say Out Loud

**Disclaimer:** I don't own One Tree Hill. I just play with the characters in my downtime.

**Author's Note:** I really wanted this to be a one-shot, but the very kind feedback on the first part inspired me to go on. And just 13 months after, aren't I quick? *wink* Oh, and while Owen turned out to be a disappointing guy, I'm still stuck on the episode when he was a nice promising man for Brooke. If you somehow get to this part without reading the first one, please read the first one, as this part may confuse you.

This is the aftermath of Lucas leaving, Peyton's POV.

* * *

Twenty-eight-year-old Peyton Sawyer looked out the window absently, drying the dishes. It had been exactly 33 hours and 28 minutes since Lucas had left the house.

"Mommy, Kay won't give me my toy!" Keith Fitzgerald Scott yelled from upstairs. Peyton drew a deep breath. Her five-year-old girl and three-year-old boy were getting a bit too much for her to handle. She put down the dishtowel, and ran up the stairs. She walked in her daughter's room, finding Kay standing on her bed, her arms raised above her head. She was keeping the stuffed bear out of reach of Keith. Keith looked at her with his blue eyes red from crying.

"Karen Penelope, give the toy back to Keith," Peyton started.

"I'm just borrowing!" Kay replied, still with her skinny arms raised. Peyton made her way toward the bed, while Keith clutched her leg, wiping his tears on her khaki pants. She ruffled his blond hair, while she motioned for Kay to hand her the bear. Kay grudgingly gave her the toy, stomping off the bed. The little girl stormed out the room.

Peyton followed her outside after handing Keith the stuffed bear. Kay marched into the kids' bathroom and locked herself inside.

"Kay." Peyton knocked softly. She heard sniffing from inside the bathroom.

"Baby." No answer.

"Karen, talk to mommy."

"You always take his side!" Kay shouted from inside.

"Honey, that's not true," Peyton said, resting her forehead against the door.

"Yes it is!"

"Kay-"

"I want daddy."

_Me too, baby. _"Let me in, Kay."

"No!" More sniffing.

Peyton sighed. She felt a small hand tug on hers. She found her son, looking up at her all scared and sad, his blue eyes identical to his father's. She knelt in front of him, and pulled him to her tight.

"She hates me," Keith whispered as he hugged her. Peyton shook her head and faced him, her miniature Lucas Scott. "No. She doesn't."

Keith still looked forlorn, so Peyton gave him a kiss on the forehead. She knocked again. "Karen, open up."

"I don't want you! I want my dad!"

_Yes, I know. But where is he?_ "You know he's not here, sweetie." Peyton whispered to Keith, "Sweetie, go to your room. I'll just talk to Kay." He nodded sadly, walking slowly to his room, dragging the bear.

Still on her knees, Peyton rapped on the door. "Honey, please open the door." She didn't know if it was her resigned tone, or the fact that Kay had heard Keith's retreating footsteps, but Kay pulled open the door. Her blue-green eyes were red and puffy, and her thin lips were in a small pout. Peyton stood up, took Karen's hand and sat down on the edge of the tub. She pulled the little girl in a hug.

"Is daddy coming home?"

_I don't know._ "Of course." She sniffed her daughter's hair. Strawberry scented.

"_P. Sawyer, you don't have a choice. I'm gonna be this beauty's godmother!" Brooke announced, rocking four-month-old Karen in her arms. _

_She laughed, slumping back against the comfy armchair on the Scotts' front porch. She again noticed the extra fifteen pounds she put on, as there was a slight bulge under her shirt. She snuck a look at her incredibly trim best friend, who looked as perfect as she did every month on the cover of B. Davis._

"_How bout Haley? She's Lucas's best friend you know," Peyton reminded her, ignoring the I'm-so-frumpy feeling she got as she sat next to the glamorous Brooke Davis. She picked up the gift bag that Brooke had bought for Karen: Baby Brooke onesies, designer pacifiers, and lots of strawberry baby body wash. _

"_I know, but you carried this adorable little muffin for nine months. He like had to do 'work' for just one night, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't work to him," Brooke teased, causing Peyton to lightly kick her shin. "Plus, Haley can have the second Sawyer-Scott brooding baby."_

"_How are you sure there'll be a next one?" Peyton asked, hoping her tone sounded light. She felt that Lucas had been a little distant lately, but her doctor had advised that this was normal; it was hard to get back in the romantic groove with a baby in the house. Peyton also thought she was just being a little emotional, and that her hormones were still screwing her up._

"_Because I know how," Brooke lowered her voice for Karen's benefit, "horny", and back to her normal voice "you guys can get"._

_Peyton chuckled. The phone rang from inside the house, so she stood up to get it. It was Haley, who was reminding them of their dinner party the next day. She was laughing with Haley when she heard the car pull up. Lucas was home. _

"_Lucas Scott! Get your butt up here!" Brooke called him. Karen gurgled happily at the sight of her daddy, who stood at the edge of the porch, leaning against the railings. _

"_Hey Brooke Davis. Giving Karen fashion tips already?"_

"_You're never too young to know what matches what. In particular, I'm not so crazy about these blue socks."_

_Peyton watched in amusement as Lucas rolled his eyes. "She's a baby, Brooke. She won't be scarred for life if her onesie doesn't match her socks."_

"_She might. But no worries." Brooke beamed confidently. "I'm her godmother so I'll make sure she's the cutest and best-dressed baby in the East Coast."_

"_You're the godmother? And when did I agree to this?" _

"_Peyton agreed. Anyway, I so kick ass at this being-a-godmother thing, Jamie Scott is one shining example, so I know you really won't mind," Brooked teased, batting her eyelashes. She turned her attention back to Karen who was gurgling again. Peyton smirked. Typical Brooke._

_She shifted her gaze back to Lucas, and froze at the look her husband gave her best friend. It was almost… wistful._

_She prayed that it was the hormones._

"Where's daddy?" Kay mumbled against her chest.

_In New York, with your Aunt Brooke. _"He's in a conference, hon."

"Will he be back soon?"

_We can only hope. _"Yeah, maybe before his birthday. But we're not sure because you know work…"

Karen sighed. Peyton spied her little boy peeking by the open door, and she held out a hand to him. "Hey Keith."

Keith shot a wary look at his sister, who turned to look at him. He walked toward his mom carefully, scared that his sister would lose it again. Peyton pulled her two children to her chest, inwardly wanting to kick herself for not being stronger for them.

"Will daddy be home for dinner?" Keith asked.

_Probably not._ "He'll try his best."

Silence followed. "When's Maddie visiting?" Keith asked out of the blue.

_It was a warm day, the last time the Andersons had visited. The lovely brunette toddler wore a white-and-pink sundress, with white sandals. She was being carried around by her doting father, but Madison had also taken a firm grip of her mom's finger, not letting it go. They looked relaxed and happy as they climbed up the steps leading to the front door of the Scotts' beach house._

"_Oh my God, Maddie! You've gotten so big!" Haley had gushed, reaching for Maddie. Maddie let herself be taken by one of her two godmothers. Her other godmother, Peyton, ruffled her thick brown hair and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "You're so pretty!"_

_Brooke chuckled, pride evident on her face. Owen put his muscular arm around Brooke. "Where's Nathan and Lucas?"_

"_In the back, grilling the burgers," Peyton answered. "And I'm pretty sure they're drinking beer." Owen grinned, kissing Brooke before he headed back out._

_The girls busied themselves with gossip and cooing over the toddler when Keith and Karen had walked in the room, red-faced from running around outside. Peyton beamed; her children looked totally adorable – Keith in a small baseball uniform and cap, while Karen had a green dress on. _

"_Aunt Brooke! Aunt Brooke!" the two blond children immediately started bounding towards Brooke. Brooke knelt, catching both breathless Scotts in her arms. "I missed you guys, how are you?"_

_Keith and Karen then started talking at once, eager to show off their new toys. Peyton grinned. "Keith, baby, let Kay show Aunt Brooke her doll first, then it's your turn to show Aunt Brooke your robot. Keep mommy and Aunt Haley company, come here."_

_Keith frowned and stomped toward them, causing the girls to laugh. Karen grabbed Brooke's hand and dragged her upstairs, gabbing a mile a minute. Peyton pulled Keith to sit on her lap at the kitchen table, while Haley sat across from her, still conversing softly with the brunette baby._

_Keith looked at Maddie with interest, crawling over the kitchen table to get a better peek. Maddie stared back at him, putting her chubby hands on the table to start crawling as well. Keith paused, transfixed. Maddie pointed to the blue button on Keith's shirt and giggled. Keith tilted his head to the right, studying Maddie, and slowly pulled off his cap to put it on top of her brown curls._

_Peyton couldn't stop the smile from spreading on her face. Haley, who was also watching the display, grinned, "These two belong together, Peyt."_

_She had to agree, despite the huge disturbing fact that they looked like mini-Brooke and mini-Lucas. _

The phone rang suddenly. Hoping against hope, Peyton gave her children hurried kisses on their foreheads and ran to answer it.

_Please be Luke, be Luke, be Luke._

It was the other Scott brother. "Hey sis-in-law, Hales just wanted me to call to see if you guys could make it to dinner tonight?"

Oh shit. She forgot about that. "Sure. And why're you calling? Where's Haley?"

"Taking a nap. She's just been so exhausted lately, helping Jamie with his homework and running after Holly."

Peyton smiled. Holly Anna was one and a half, and had the boundless energy of a Scott. "If Mrs. Scott's sleeping, who's cooking tonight?"

"That would be me, Chef Nathan Scott, at your service."

"In that case, I think we should have take-out instead," she kidded good-naturedly. Nathan laughed. "I would too, if Haley wasn't so set on having homemade macaroni and cheese."

"Whipped!" Peyton said. Nathan laughed again, "Hey, is Lucas around? I'm gonna give him a list of good summer camps for Kay and Keith."

She felt her breath catch in her throat. She couldn't tell Nathan, not just yet. "Oh, just email them to me. I'll make sure he gets them."

"Okay. Bye Peyt."

"Um, Nate, could you have Hales call me when she wakes up?"

"Sure."

She ignored the heartache she felt after putting down the phone. She pulled her hair in a ponytail and resolved to give her children a bath.

* * *

"Hey Peyton," Haley called out to her. She had been waiting for Haley at the playground, watching Kay and Keith roll around the sandbox. So much for that bath.

"Haley." She stood up to give the shorter girl a quick hug. They both sat down, observing the kids.

"So, what's up?" Haley asked, after a few minutes of silence. Peyton had been vague in their earlier phone conversation, when she asked Haley to meet up with her. Haley, being her usual kind and patient self, had not prodded.

"It's not good, Hales." Her eyes remained fixed on the two blond children. She felt a comforting hand on her arm. She took a deep breath. "Lucas left." _He left me. He left us._

"Lucas left?" Haley managed to keep her voice down. "For a conference?"

"No." _He left for good._ Peyton felt really pathetic at that moment.

Haley studied her, taking in her crestfallen expression. There was a strange tone of finality in the blond girl's voice. "When?"

"The other day."

"Did you fight?"

Peyton turned to Haley. "No." _We haven't talked at all._

The smaller woman pulled her for a hug. Peyton let tears fall, biting her lip to keep from making a noise.

"He's Lucas. You're Peyton. You belong together, and he knows that. He'll be back." Haley smoothed her hair.

"Yeah," she echoed dumbly. _No, he won't._


End file.
